I do
by Vanamo
Summary: Sequel to Anonymousow's 'Maybe'. Remy and Allison are getting married! But of course, things don't go smoothly. Will they even make it down the aisle?
1. Chapter 1

So Saturday morning Anonymousow and I were bored and talking, and I ended up being talked into writing a sequel to her story 'Maybe', which is really begging for a continuance. I just was going to do a one shot, but being me, I had to do the whole grand affair. Clearly dedicated to Anonymousow and anyone getting married! I'll try not to go over 10,000 words XP Enjoy.

Reuploaded because apparently fiancé is not the same as fiancée, gender-wise...*fail*

* * *

"Allison, I'm not wearing a dress!"

"For the last time Remy, I want a wedding and you're wearing a dress."

"We can't even get married in New Jersey; it'll be a civil union. We'll be in Massachusetts at a Bed & Breakfast for the wedding. Do you know how boring that sounds? I'm not spending thousands of dollars on a dress I'll only wear once," Remy grumbled as she fell back onto the bed. It was Saturday morning and ever since Remy _had _proposed, Allison had been abuzz with everything wedding related.

"Baby, I want this to be special," Allison said, drawing out the first word in that if-you-love-me-you'll-stop-being-a-little-bitch-and-let-me-have-what-I-want tone.

"This is your _third_ wedding Allison, maybe we can make this one special by, oh…eloping on a bus and getting rings from those cool little 50 cent machines at the supermarket," Remy said, throwing her hands up and covering her eyes.

"Yes, my _third_ wedding," Allison repeated, glaring. "They say the third time's the charm, right? I want things to be perfect." When she received no reply, she crawled up in the bed next to her and wrapped her arms around Remy's waist. In a sweet voice, she said, "Because…I have never been as happy as I am with you, and I love you, and I want you to be my wife, and –"

"STOP with the cuteness! It's disgusting!" Remy screamed, laughing in spite of herself. Allison beamed, pushing up Remy's loose shirt and nuzzling her stomach, inhaling her scent. "Ally, come on, that tickles!"

Allison exhaled and let her fingers brush over Remy's skin. "I just…want to do this every day. I want you to be mine."

"I'm already yours…rings on our fingers or a big cake don't make what we have any more special," Remy explained. "I mean, I never thought I'd get married. This is all new ground for me."

"I know," Allison said with a smirk, "which is why tomorrow we're going dress shopping."

"Ally, no!" Remy whined.

"Remy Hadley, you wore a dress to my second wedding. Why won't you wear one on your wedding day?" Allison challenged, sitting up.

"Think about it Allison! If we're both wearing big poofy dresses, how am I supposed to lean in and kiss you after the I do's? And who gives us away? Do I stand at the altar or do we both walk down the aisle?" Remy said, eyes darting from side to side in confusion.

"This…is really stressing you out isn't it?" the blonde questioned.

Remy sighed and nodded, running her fingers through her hair. "I didn't really think about it. I guess I didn't wrap my head around the whole marriage thing."

Allison grinned and kissed her now fiancée softly. "Things will be fine. We don't even have a date set yet. So stop worrying and learn to give into conformity."

"Marriage is conformity?" Remy asked with a smirk.

"That's what House calls it," Allison said, "I think…well this is my third time around. The first time, I was young and thought I knew what I was doing. Clearly I didn't. The second time, I was scared and just…wanting to be normal. This time…I'm saying I finally found the one person in the world I can't imagine living without. The person I'd be happy with staying like this…forever."

Remy swallowed and rubbed the older doctor's cheek with her thumb. "Ally, I…" Abruptly a low rumbling was heard. Both women began to laugh. "I think my stomach says it's time for dinner."

The blonde smirked. "I think we can do that."

"Allison?" Remy asked.

"Yeah Remy?"

"I love you," she said sincerely. She felt like she had never meant those words so much.

"I love you too," Allison answered.

"Allison?" Remy asked with a hint of a grin.

The other doctor smirked. "Yeah Remy?"

"What are we going to tell House?"

"Oh god, _House!" _

"Does this mean I get out of wearing a dress?"

"No!"

* * *

Remy could not believe this was happening. In the past forty-eight hours, she had lost all will to fight House's naggings. He had known about their relationship – he was House, of course – but this was just the little figurines on his mental, metaphorical cake. He was ecstatic because, as he claimed, he'd known his little duckling would propose. And now, much to Remy's dismay, House was involved in their wedding as she was.

They were dress shopping.

Cameron and House insisted on going to some fancy dress shop in the heart of New York. Remy continually internally questioned why all of this fuss was necessary as she looked around at various brides and their friends and family. It was just her, Allison, and House, so she felt out of place. She also realized that with the presence of testosterone, they might be giving off the wrong vibe. House was a jerk, but he was also considered by some to be quite sexy in that scruffy, rough around the edges way with those blue eyes that would melt your heart…or mentally undress you. Allison screamed excited bride, while she –

"Party of Hadley and Cameron?" a voice called.

"That's –" Remy started.

"Us," Cameron cut her off, standing up. House used his cane to hoist himself up as the consultant came towards them.

It was a professional looking redhead woman in her early 40's. "You're the bride?" she asked with a warm smile. "And this is your…fiancé?"

"Actually, uh," Allison stammered.

"And this must be the maid of honor," the woman continued.

"Actually," Remy spoke up, "I'm the bride." After placing her hand on Allison's waist, she said, "And this is also the bride."

The consultant's eyes widened slightly. "Ah."

House leaned in whispered quite obviously, "They're gay!"

"I see that," she said. "I'm Sandra, welcome to Julian's Dresses. Is there any particular style or price point we're thinking about? We also have suits, if you want to…"

Remy tuned her out at that point, thoroughly annoyed by the woman and the overall atmosphere. This was clearly going to be long and tedious. She could only hope that the rest of the planning was something they could pay someone to take care of.

"Thirteen!"

Remy looked up and raised her eyebrows. "Hm?"

House rolled his eyes. "Your wife-to-be is trying on dresses you'll be paying in the five digits for. Pay attention."

"Five digits?" Remy repeated, flabbergasted. "Why can't she just wear the one she married Chase in?"

"Burnt in the divorce ritual," House deadpanned. "It was last season anyway."

"God dammit," she muttered. She'd rather save that money for rent. They were doctors, but it wasn't like they were swimming in cash. Remy was still paying off her med school loans. "How long does it take her to get into a dress?"

"Here we are!" Sandra announced. Remy turned and gasped. The blonde was no less than astounding. The dress was with a v-neck – simple, but elegant and well fitted.

"What do you think?" the older doctor asked with a huge smile, unable to hide her excitement.

"You look…wow," Remy breathed, looking her over. She couldn't believe this was happening.

"Is it too simple? I'm not sure if I love this," Allison said, placing her hands on her ribs where there was a seam that gave her more of an hourglass shape. She turned around and showed them the back, where fabric hung like extravagant curtains. "And I don't know if I like this wave pattern thing."

A small stitch formed in Remy's brow as she began to analyze the dress instead of her fiancée. "Hm…"

"What she wants to say is 'Baby-cakes, you look gorgeous in everything but this is shit in chiffon'," House provided in his best gay voice, clasping his hands together.

Remy glared at him. "That was borderline creepy, but he's right," she told the older doctor gently.

Cameron rolled her eyes. "Well thank you for not letting me get married in the ultimate fashion faux pas. I'll go try another," she said.

Sandra led her back to the dressing rooms and Remy released a breath she hadn't noticed she was holding. House observed this and said off-handedly, "You're so whipped."

Remy gave him a look. Why did he have to always be right? "Shut up," she muttered.

He smirked and leaned back on the couch. She crossed her legs and arms and waited for Cameron to come out in the next dress.

"You know," House said, brazenly ignoring her orders, "I'm sure they have collections you could look at that would match her dress. You don't _have _to wear a suit, you're not that butch. You're not even fully gay."

"I don't _want _to wear a suit," Remy shot back, "I just…never mind."

"What? Tell uncle House all your troubles," he said with a smooth grin. He had her now.

She sighed and closed her eyes. "I…want a dress. But I want Allison to be the one who shines. So it's better if she thinks I don't want one."

House looked at her for a minute and then, in a classic House move, barked, "You're an _idiot. _In case you forgot, you're getting married too." He stood up and grabbed her hand, "Come with me."

Remy found herself being pulled along across the floor and towards the racks of dresses. "What, wait! House!"

He was annoyingly strong as he limped through a doorway and they found themselves in a stock room chock piled with white gowns. House shut the door behind them. "Now," he said in condescendingly, as if it had been such a burden on _him_ to make this happen, "find a dress you want."

Remy looked around with wide, slightly frightened eyes. The amount of choices was overwhelming. Seeing this, House grabbed her arm again. "Do I have to do everything around here?" he asked as he pulled her deep into one of the aisles.

Despite her nervousness, Remy couldn't help but say, "If you want it done right."

They stopped along one wall racked with dresses in large bags. "Look through these," House said, pulling a few random ones, "You're size -5 after all."

She rolled her eyes but was quickly burdened under the weight of dress after dress. "House! That's enough!"

"Whoopee," he deadpanned, "Let's go find a room."

"What about Cameron?" the younger doctor asked, following him blindly while trying not to lose anything.

They passed a row of veils and he unceremoniously threw one on her head. "Maybe she'll run into somebody and stop to chat. Or fall in love with another broken person and drown them in caring, and then you won't have to bother planning a wedding."

Remy bit back a groan and followed.

* * *

Cameron had finally bamboozled her way into the second dress. She hadn't really had time to do proper dress shopping on either of her weddings. In short she took whatever looked nice and was cheap (yes, giant contradiction) which was something you just didn't do for your wedding day. This was her chance to get something she _loved._ She was definitely not settling.

Of course, now she had to go through the exhausting shopping process. This second dress was so difficult to get into she almost didn't bother to come out in it. But, she told herself, Remy would want to see it. When she opened the door, Sandra wasn't there. She guessed that she was placing the first dress back wherever it came from. Looking around the hallway, she gathered up the puffy dress and tried to remember which way it was to the main area.

"I'm not sure about this," Remy said, looking down at herself.

House rolled his eyes and tapped his cane on the floor outside the door. "Just come out here, let me see."

"No, this was stupid," Remy answered, trying to unzip herself.

"Thirty one, either you come out or I come in," House said with a knowing grin. With no answer, he opened the door. To his surprise, it wasn't locked. He was positive it would have been.

Thirteen quickly pulled the small bit of the dress that had been unzipped back up and tried to cover herself. She looked like a deer caught in the headlights. He swallowed back any lecherous comments and her lips formed a thin line. "Well?" he said impatiently.

"I can't zip it back up," she admitted sheepishly.

He made a tutting sound with his tongue and hobbled over. "I'm telling Cameron you've been sneaking extra desert," he told her as he zipped her up. The zipper was almost right along her spine, she would have had to nearly dislocate a shoulder trying to zip it up all the way.

"Yeah yeah," Thirteen waved the comment off and backed away to the other side of the room. "I can't believe I'm asking this, but how do I look?"

He looked her over a few times, expression unreadable. "You look…" He stopped. Then, without another word, opened the door and limped off.

"House!" she called after him. This was just great. Not having much of a choice, she ran – as well as one could run in a wedding dress – after him.

Cameron wandered hallway to hallway, feeling more and more lost with each step of her tiny heels. She couldn't believe she hadn't run into a single person she could directions from, but how embarrassing was it to be lost in a bridal store? Finally giving up, she stopped at a fork where two hallways looked like they led into hers and called, "Hello? Is anyone here?"

Remy continued to walk through the maze of the back rooms, listening for the familiar thump of House's cane. She hadn't seen her way in so she knew that she'd have a bit of trouble getting out, but the amount of intertwining hallways here was just to the point of ridiculousness. They needed freaking signposts! Finally, she came to a stop at a corner of joining hallways where there was a bench and let herself sink onto it. She felt around for her cell to call Allison before realizing that no wedding dress had pockets. Great.

After a moment…footsteps, thank god! Allison looked down the hall to the right and came face to face with…

"Chase?"

* * *

Oh I'm so mean. It's the first chapter and I give you a cliffhanger! Don't kill me?


	2. Chapter 2

Thirteen was pressing her palms up against the wall of the hallway so hard that she was sure her fingerprints would perfectly ID her for the potential murder that could take place in the next five minutes. She could hear the police now: bludgeoned and stabbed to death with a pair of Calvin Klein, champagne ivory platform sandals. His blonde hair never stood a chance.

"Allison," Chase said softly, wide eyes. "What're you…?"

"I'm, um," she stammered, really wishing more than ever that she could run in these heels.

"Well! What do we have here?"

Both doctors turned and looked down the hall to see none other than the ringmaster himself. House leaned on his cane and sighed. "This certainly brings back memories," he said.

Chase rolled his eyes and put his hands on his hips, looking down at the floor. "Great," he muttered. Cameron was about to open her mouth when Chase began to explain anyway. "I got a text from one of my friends in med school that he was getting hitched and I needed to rent a tux." He turned to House and glared tiredly.

House looked confused for a second before exclaiming, "Oh, he's getting married! Wow, you just never know who you'll run into at these places. Cameron here has finally learned to accept her sexual identity and is committing to her hopefully final life partner."

"House, go away," Cameron huffed.

"Life partner?" Chase asked in a slightly higher octave.

"Yup. Regular old born-again lesbian. She's knocked up too," House supplied with a grin.

"I am not!"

"She is NOT!" Thirteen exclaimed, jumping out from the hall. The three older doctors whipped around at the noise. Remy suddenly found herself wishing there was a corner to back into. Or she could find a curtain and hopefully they'd pay no attention.

"There's our other lovely bride now," House said with a twinkle in his eye so obviously fake that Thirteen had to really work on channeling her inner anger to resist punching him. Wow, weddings made her violent.

"Maybe I should just…" Chase trailed off and looked for the nearest exit out of the corner of his eye.

"Oh no, don't you see?" House said, gesturing to the two women, "This is a great chance to get a second opinion on if your dresses match. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go over the color scheme. Ecru or alabaster for the tablecloth, so many decisions you wouldn't _believe_!" With that he waved adieu and scurried, or rather hobbled, away.

The next ten seconds were arguably the most awkward of Remy Hadley's life. She glanced at Allison, whose eyes were also darting all over the place. Chase had his eyes closed.

"I'm happy for you."

And then there was the metaphorical screeching sound of a stopped record, where people go WHAT? The shock was evident on both women's faces. Under Remy's there was clear skepticism, but Allison was just completely taken aback.

"Really," Chase said flatly. Cameron raised an eyebrow and his expression softened. "I mean it. I'm sorry that I wasn't the one for you. I don't know if I'll just always be hung up on you…but you deserve to be happy."

Cameron bit her lip and nodded.

Next he turned to Thirteen. The brunette met his eyes expectantly, almost challengingly. Chase bit the inside of his cheek and stayed silent through the stare down. Remy then realized that he didn't need to say any words. From the months working together they'd developed their own dynamic. She wasn't the one who'd stolen his wife or betrayed him; she was the coworker and friend who he couldn't hold a grudge against. Thirteen nodded in understanding. It was as much of a blessing as they'd get.

"Do you have a date set?" he asked them.

"Not yet," Cameron said uneasily.

Chase nodded and wiped his nose. "Well…let me know." After quick glances again at both women, he made his way down one of the hallways.

Remy and Allison both breathed a huge sigh of relief.

"Please tell me you don't have any really conceited ex-girlfriends that are still in love with you," Cameron said, letting her shoulders drop all their previous tension.

"Unfortunately, I've lost count," Remy admitted with a nervous tone.

"What?" Cameron gasped in horror.

Remy quickly leaned forward and gave her future wife a hug. "I'm kidding!" she laughed, rubbing her back.

Allison buried her head in Remy's left shoulder before giving her a firm punch in the other. "Don't give me a heart attack like that!" the older doctor spat.

Remy rubbed her shoulder and gave Cameron a pouty look. The blonde continued to glare and Remy grinned. "You're marrying a smartass, get used to it."

Cameron exhaled a long breath as they parted their embrace just a bit. "We're really getting married, aren't we?"

Thirteen nodded. "It still feels kind of surreal, doesn't it?"

"Yeah," Cameron said more to herself in agreement before saying a moment later, "You're in a dress."

"And the state the obvious award of the day goes to…" Remy started, rolling her eyes.

"Stop that," Cameron cut her off, still focused on the gown. The dress looked amazing and so did she. Her hair looked like waves of milk chocolate and framed her jaw line perfectly. The dress had a high collar with a touch of classy, Asian elegance but had that ambiguous look that was very Remy before giving way to softer, simpler folds of fabric. Effortlessly beautiful. Remy began to blush. "You…" Cameron looked up, "I want to marry you right here."

Thirteen shook her head. "House would have a fit if he missed it. Besides, we don't have wedding rings, or a guest list…"

"No, you misunderstood," Cameron said with a devilish look. "I want to marry you now so this dress comes off."

Remy moved her mouth to the side and pretended to think about the idea for a minute. "I _think _we have to buy the dresses first."

"Then let's buy them," Allison said simply.

"How much is yours?" Remy asked skeptically.

"Five thousand?" she answered, shrugging sheepishly.

"Mine is at least that," Remy sighed.

"Let's see if it has a label…" Cameron said softly. She began to run her hands along the brunette's shoulders and back, up to the collar.

"Allison…" Remy gasped.

"One of these dressing rooms is bound to be open," the older doctor whispered in her ear.

"Locked," she managed to get out.

The back of Cameron's hand trailed up Thirteen's neck and she pulled out the bobby pin holding back her bangs with a smirk.

"I love the way you think."

Cameron gave her a peck on the lips and teased her by running her tongue along Remy's lower lip. "I know," she mouthed as they backed towards the nearest door.

* * *

Remy and Allison were on the couch after an exhausting day. House had eventually been tracked down in another part of the store, and, much to their horror, pretending to be a consultant. It had made the rest of the visit a real mess. Despite the ridiculous price, Cameron had talked Thirteen into getting the dress on the threat that she wouldn't buy her dress if Remy didn't get hers. Now they had fittings scheduled and things were steadily coming along. Also crossed off the list that day were shoes and accessories, because girls had to look their best.

"So," Allison said, playing with the collar of Remy's shirt, "What are we doing tomorrow?" She was on top of the younger doctor and they had spent the last half hour kissing and just enjoying the closeness. Coupled with a few sips of red wine, Cameron proudly admitted that it was almost as good as sex.

"Work?" Remy guessed without opening her eyes.

Cameron sighed in mock-annoyance, but continued to watch her fiancée. She loved the complete relaxation she sometimes found in her face (not enough of the time, in her opinion) and because of it, Cameron felt calmer and just felt herself fall deeper in love. "Besides that," she said. "What are we doing, wedding-wise?"

"What do you want to do?" Remy questioned. She cracked open one eye and kissed the older doctor's chin.

Cameron smiled. "What has House already done?"

Thirteen shrugged. "I'm sure he's got a whole grand plan going."

Cameron stretched out her arm which had previously been propping her up so she was now lying against the younger doctor's chest. "For once I wish House wouldn't stick his cane in everything."

Remy immediately snorted and covered her mouth. Allison rolled her eyes, "Grow up."

The brunette's eyes lit up. "Sorry. But I kind of like when House interferes. He wouldn't be House if he didn't, and besides, it makes life more interesting."

"Yes, without House we'd never just smell the roses," Allison muttered against Remy's chest.

The younger doctor flicked a stray piece of hair away from Cameron's face. "Roses, huh?

"What about them?" she asked.

"That's not a bad idea," Thirteen said simply. "Brides need flowers."

"Smelling all the roses…" Cameron mused out loud. "That sounds perfect."

* * *

They arrived at a nice little garden shop at around ten the next morning. Cameron had taken one of her personal days, which Remy guessed accumulated to a few months by now, and Remy had called Taub and asked him to cover for her and keep House off her back. When probed she admitted that she was utterly lovesick. He didn't believe her and hung up.

"Look at all of this, Rem," Cameron said, pulling her over to a shelf of pottery by local artists, which the store also sold.

"Oh wow," Thirteen gasped, admiring a deep tan bowl with a weaving, tiled design. "Can we buy this too?"

"We'll see," Cameron smirked. "For now we need to look at bouquets." She jogged over to the walls of flowers with the younger doctor trying to keep up.

At all the selections, Remy groaned. "There are so many! How are we supposed to choose?"

"You need help, yes?" a young man in an apron asked her with a heavy Spanish accent.

"Ah, no thanks," she said politely. He nodded and waved as he walked away.

"What flowers do you like?" Cameron questioned.

"I'm not really a flower person," Remy said. Her shoulders fell; maybe she shouldn't have turned that guy away.

"Well humor me," Cameron said sarcastically. She moved a few pots to the side, "Oh, what about these? Pink Sweetheart Roses, doesn't that just sound _divine_, precious?"

"Oh now _darling_, wouldn't you prefer something like…this?" Thirteen asked, pulling down a Venus flytrap. Allison looked at her in horror. Remy continued passionately, "Allison, I love you so much that I couldn't imagine _not_ walking down the aisle with you holding this smelly, ugly, carnivorous plant. It just enhances your beauty _so_ much!"

"Oh no!" Cameron gasped. "I couldn't, not when you," she rummaged through the plants, groping around until she winced, "could have this quaint, _charming_ little cactus."

"Oh baby, you're _too _good to me," Remy cooed, patting Allison's head. "But I'm afraid I might throw that cactus at you if you keep it up."

Both women burst into laughter at their utter silliness. After five minutes they were finally able to control themselves to the level of smiling until their cheeks hurt. Cameron smirked dubiously, "Hey Rem…I have an idea."

"Oh yeah?" she asked, getting closer and raising an eyebrow. "What's that?"

"Stick your hand in the Venus Flytrap," Cameron whispered.

"What?" Remy gasped. "No way! It would eat my hand! Do you want a wife with one hand, Allison?"

"Oh don't be a drama queen, it only eats flies. Worst comes to worst, I'm sure they've got hedge clippers," she said.

"Oh that's comforting," Thirteen said, apprehensively looking at the plant.

Seeing the lack of excitement from her fiancée, Cameron shook her shoulders a bit. "Come on! Please? You aren't scared, are you?" she challenged.

"Oh that was low," Remy commented, rolling her eyes. She sighed dramatically, "Fine. Let me take off my ring in case I never see this hand again. Hold please," she said, placing her matching engagement ring in Cameron's open palm.

Remy rolled up her sleeves and scowled at it. "Oh get on with it!" Cameron egged her on.

Remy raised her hand and was just about to stick her finger in the interior of the plant when –

"YES! Saved by the phone!" Remy cheered. Cameron groaned as the brunette pulled out the cell phone from her back pocket with her other hand. "Hello?"

"It's Taub. Just thought I'd let you know that House…escaped."

Thirteen frowned. "What do you mean escaped?"

"I mean he's not here and whatever you're doing right now, I'd be on the lookout," he explained.

"On the lookout?"

"I think he knows where you –"

_Bang! _

"Oh my god!" Cameron screeched, her hands covering her head on instinct.

"What?" Remy gasped, her phone clattering to the floor. In her startled state, her hand previously over the plant brushed the hairs. "Oh shit!" she shrieked as the plant started to close in on her hand. "Ally, Ally, help!"

"Oh for Christ's sake, pull your hand out!" Cameron yelled, yanking Remy's wrist out of the quickly closing plant.

"Oh my god," the brunette breathed, holding her hand to her chest. The plant was now completely closed and releasing digestion enzymes for what would have been her hand. "What was that sound?"

"I don't know," Allison said, looking around. "It sounded like a bunch of pottery, or ceramics or something." Sure enough, "Here, look, someone knocked them over."

Thirteen, still traumatized, followed her to see many overturned brown potting plants and more ornate decorations in pieces on the floor. Suddenly one of the piles moved. "Oh god!" Cameron cried.

"What, what?"

"Remy…the engagement ring!" Allison showed her her open and very empty palms in horror.

"You lost it?"

"Oh _no_!" a voice said loudly.

Both women spun around as more pots fell away from the pile. Finally, a person's head emerged.

House was on the floor in a stolen blue apron, covered in pottery dust. He looked up innocently and wiggled his eyebrows, saying in his best accent, "You need help finding bouquet, yes?"

* * *

Apologies for the delay, I've got tests coming up which I won't study for but still somehow take up my time :p You guys didn't think I'd let Chase ruin things right? This chapter (especially the end) was SO much fun to write! Less than 13 gets a little nod for inspiring the whole venus fly trap thing XD And thank you iyimgrace, my brainstorming buddy :) This story will be 5 chapters and MAY go up to an M rating. MAYBE XD


	3. Chapter 3

Hehe, enjoy!

* * *

Thirteen, Cameron, and Taub were seated at the glass table in the Diagnostics office. It was 16:00 hours AE, or after the event as Cameron had begun to call it, and Thirteen was still one angry bride-to-be. Not that the blonde hadn't been pissed off, but when the younger doctor picked up a flower pot and aimed for House's head, it was time to interfere. They found the ring after a few minutes of scouring the floor and clearing it of dust and debris under a few lilies that had been shielded from the small explosion.

"Ok, we need a plan," Thirteen announced. Her fists were clenched and she seemed to have trouble deciding whether to sit and scowl or stand up and pace.

"Ok, I'll bite. For what?" Taub asked, though his tone suggested he couldn't care less.

"We haven't picked out the cake yet. If House finds out, he'll get, I don't know, a Vegas cake with a Russian Roulette wheel, lucky sevens, and fluffy dice at the top with sparkling champagne," Remy explained, going back to pacing and trying to talk with her arms.

"Oh no, that'll be for your bachelorette party," House announced as he entered.

"I'm not having a bachelorette party, House," Thirteen huffed, turning around. Her eyes went wide when she saw his…entourage.

One by one, disgruntled nurses were carrying in trays of cake samples. At the end of the line, a male nurse was struggling with a box while a middle aged balding man in a suit frantically scurried in front of him with his arms out. "Ohhh be _careful _with that! This is precious cargo! If my boss even _knew _about this I'd be hung by my cufflinks!" he hissed as they backed into the room.

All three doctors stared him oddly while House looked quite proud of himself. The irritated troop of nurses glared at him. "Oh, my apologies ladies, you're free to go," he said, even opening the door. House _never _opened doors – something was up.

The man had wide, buggy eyes behind thick glasses. He smoothed down the little dark hair he had. "Now, Dr House, where is the young woman? The one with only weeks to live, who-whose only wish is to pick out her wedding ring?"

"Well…I may have exaggerated a _bit _on her prognosis. These are our lovely ladies," he explained, gesturing to Cameron and Thirteen. "It should be pretty clear which one radiates caring and which one is tragically broken."

"Go to hell, House," Cameron spat.

Buggy's eyes widened even more and he revealed another one of his many creepy quirks, stuttering. "W-well then, l-let's t-take a lo-look and ah, um, take the m-measurements. Yes now." He picked up Cameron's hand and examined it for a split second before dropping it back on the table. Remy quirked an eyebrow, not loving the customer service. "Yes, as I thought, just the size…diameter, yes, perfect," he continued to mutter as he wrote down Cameron's size on a pad from his breast pocket.

"N-now, let's see about you," Buggy said, grabbing Thirteen's hand. He patted it and smiled at her, which looked more like a grimace. She bit the inside of her cheek to keep from recoiling her hand. She could be wrist-deep in someone's bowels, but this was just creepy. "Yes, just perfect," he mumbled, "Oh, what n-nice fingers."

"Indeed," House commented with a wink. Remy rolled her eyes. Taub, who had pulled out People magazine in utter boredom so he could scrutinize all the botch plastic surgery, smirked at the observation.

"Now then, we have a wide variety of rings to choose from. H-have you decided on an engraving?" Buggy asked.

"Um," Cameron looked over to Thirteen, who was giving her a thoroughly lost look.

Buggy gasped as if the world was coming to an end. "Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear," he said under his breath, rocking back and forth slightly. "This just won't do. You must decide on an engraving, it makes the ring!" He pulled out a few loose leaf papers from his brief case. "These, here are some s-suggestions. I-It's of the upmost importance!"

"Taub," House finally spoke up. "What's on your ring? Actually, I'm surprised you still wear it. Do Jews even get their rings engraved? I feel like it goes against Kosher…somehow."

Taub refrained from rolling his eyes. "You're my one and only," he replied flatly.

Thirteen couldn't stop herself from smirking.

"Solomon had 700 wives, give or take a few who were just concubines," House said with a triumphant grin. Taub went back to his tabloids.

"Well then, that's lovely, and you'll pick out an engraving, y-yes, yes. If I may, the r-rings? F-for selection?" Buggy said, pulling on latex gloves. The silver latch fell open and he opened it to reveal rows of beautiful gold, silver, and diamond rings.

"Wow," Cameron couldn't help but whisper.

"If I may suggest one," Buggy said, "T-This piece is fourteen karat gold, um, with a silver lining on the inside. Get it? Silver lining…" He received blank looks and bowed his head back into his safe little box. "And if you have something more traditional in mind –"

"I like this one," House interrupted plucking out a flashy platinum ring.

"Oh! That is a lovely piece," Buggy squeaked. "Encrusted around the ring with a fine ruby, amber, yellow topaz, emerald, sapphire, and amethyst, such a lovely specimen…"

"In other words, a rainbow," Remy deadpanned.

House looked at them before pumping his fist, "Gay pride!"

"No," Thirteen and Cameron said in unison.

House rolled his eyes and put it back. "But _this _would be perfect for Thirteen," House told them, throwing the ring at her. Buggy's eyes bugged out for a split second before the young doctor caught it and placed it on her finger. "Oh dear," House said, "Calm to angry in a matter of seconds. Or horny, I don't have the decoder."

"_Definitely _horny," Thirteen joked, yanking off the ring. Cameron hated to admit it, but that would actually be useful to distinguish Remy's brooding moments.

"You can't do that!" Buggy spoke up. "You wear it, you buy it!"

Cameron gaped at him. "What kind of bs policy is that? It's a ring, of course you try it on!"

"No, no, no, no, it's a very sensitive ring and it's already been exposed to the unique oil and chemical formula of her skin. She must make the purchase," Buggy explained, holding up his own gloved hands.

"How much is it?" Thirteen asked, not believing her ears.

"$1450 plus tax, which plus 7% tax is…"

"No way!" Cameron shouted incredulously. "If anything, House touched it first!"

"No, it doesn't work like that!"

Thirteen, whose jaw had been clenched in anger, suddenly became lax. She blinked heavily a few times and tried to stand up, but stumbled and fell grandly to the floor in a heap.

"Remy!" Allison screamed, instantly at her side. Taub also sprung into action and knelt down to take her pulse.

"Someone get in here!" House shouted.

Buggy was freaking out. "Ohhh n-no n-no no! She's t-taken a t-turn for the worse! I didn't – I never meant to – oh, is she alright?"

"She's in a coma," Taub said gravely.

Buggy fainted.

* * *

"You're so brilliant sometimes, you know."

"Of course I know."

"Smartass."

"Hey, you said it yourself," Remy teased her, sticking out her tongue. They had retired to bed after quite another eventful day.

"How'd you think to pretend to pass out like that?" Allison asked, kicking her foot playfully in return.

"House said I had weeks to live, I thought fainting from stress wouldn't be such a huge stretch," Remy explained with a self-satisfied grin.

"You nearly gave me a heart attack, you know," the older doctor said somewhat seriously.

"I know, I'm sorry," the brunette whispered sincerely. "But I figured the dramatic wink when you ran over was enough to convince you I wasn't dead."

Cameron chuckled under her breath. "Yes, you get an A in acting. Right out of a soap, really."

"Aww, my number one fan," Remy cooed.

"Yes," she said, kissing her cheek. "Don't push it."

The younger doctor smirked and settled further in the arms of the blonde. There was a comfortable silence before Remy asked, "What should we have engraved?"

Cameron shrugged. "I honestly haven't thought about it."

"What did you decide on with Chase?" Remy asked carefully, knowing she had to tread lightly.

"He decided himself," Cameron huffed, though clearly not at the brunette, "'Always Tuesday'."

Remy made a repulsed face. "That's so shallow. Please tell me you don't have that thing anymore."

"Don't worry, I don't," Allison said quickly. "With my first husband we wore his parents' rings; which were just silver bands with their original wedding date." She looked at Remy for a moment and said softly, "I can't even find words for us. This…it's not perfect, but at the same time it is. I could never want more and never want to be anywhere else than…here with you."

Remy was quiet before saying softly, "I _think _that's too many letters."

Allison grinned and they both found themselves laughing. "We did get that list of suggested engravings from the creepy guy who practically fondled my hand," Cameron said. "It was all sweaty and bulky, like my middle school principal."

"I was ready to give him a shot of Haldol in the ass," the younger doctor grumbled.

"As much as I love it when you're protective, I'm glad you chose the fainting route," the blonde said with a smirk. She pulled back the sheets and walked over to where her jeans had been thrown in their haste to release all the pent up frustration that came from the renewed honeymoon phase that came with being engaged. Thirteen sat up and watched as her fiancée walked across the room. Cameron sensed her gaze and turned, quirking an eyebrow. "It's nothing I haven't seen before," Remy teased innocently.

"You're lucky you're cute," Cameron joked back, climbing back into bed after pulling on a loose tank top. Remy heaved a sigh in disappointment, but rested her head against the blonde's chest anyway.

"Ok, let's take a look," Allison said, flipping to the first page.

"These are…"

"Um…"

"Weird," Remy finished for her.

"Bow Chicka Wow Wow? Really? Who puts that on their wedding ring?" the older doctor asked incredulously.

"It's kind of an oxymoron if you think about it," Remy said, smirking. "How about…'what happened in Vegas' then on the other one 'followed me home'?"

"If you were so drunk that you got married in Vegas, how would you get your rings engraved?" Cameron asked.

"I'm sure you can get ones pre-engraved," Thirteen said, "But yeah, 'Viva la insert name of unfortunate soul here' would make more sense." She cocked her head, "Unless you want to ditch all this planning and hop on a plane."

Cameron snorted and shook her head. "No thanks."

"What about a tropical wedding?" Remy asked. She gasped, "We could go to Cabo."

"Remy…" Allison groaned. "Imagine wearing our dresses on a beach in Cabo."

"Dammit," she said, realizing the great point. "What if we did it on a balcony or something? Then we could –"

"No means no," Cameron said in a sing song voice.

Thirteen sighed. "Fine. Any other fun engravings?"

"I found my Nemo, a deal's a deal, better than ice cream, Olive Oyl forever, I kissed you first…" Cameron read off, "My noose?"

"It means I'm _hung up_ on you," Remy said lightly.

"Yeah, nothing like macabre humor to get you in the mood," she said.

"Two wishes left," Remy read, "That's kinda sweet."

"Too cliché," Cameron replied. She grabbed a pen and began crossing off all the eliminated choices.

"Oh just let me see it!" Remy exclaimed, yanking the paper away. "I'll find the best one."

"Hey, no!" Allison said, trying to grab the paper back. Remy snatched the pen and began crossing each one out.

"Remy, give it!" she said, failing as the younger woman kept moving out of reach. In a moment of stillness, Cameron pinned her down and tried to grab the paper from her hand, which was frantically waving the paper.

"Ally, get off!"

"No, let me see!"

"Wait!"

"Come on!"

Remy stopped and the paper somehow fell and Allison made a grab for it. "Why does it matter so –"

Remy quickly shut her eyes in preparation, but nothing came. She cracked one eye open and saw just a hint of a smile on her fiancée's face. Cameron held the list up against her chest and came closer as Remy sat up.

"I like it," she whispered in Remy's ear.

"I sense a but…" Thirteen said.

"'One soul, two hearts'," Cameron repeated, "It screams Xena Warrior Princess."

"I'll have you know I loved that show. And Buffy," the younger woman said, smirking. "Fine, how about the Olive Oyl one? I liked that."

"You want that engraved on our wedding rings?" Cameron asked. "I hate to break it to you Rem, but you're no Popeye."

Remy rolled her eyes. "Then what?"

Allison thought for a moment. "…Love."

"Love?" Remy repeated.

Allison nodded. "That's all we need, right?"

Thirteen nodded and kissed her forehead. "I think so."

* * *

I'm having so much fun writing this story! XD There was an alternate and rather sad ending that came out of nowhere, but I bs-ed most of this chapter *cough* story! *cough* and I don't want to end it at 5 chapters anymore lol. I'll be busy most of the weekend (I know, sorry fangirls :p) so the album leaf update (and this one, obviously) is unlikely til Monday or Tuesday at the earliest. And thanks iyimgrace for reading it over and convincing me to ditch the sadness and save it for the epic depression story.


	4. Chapter 4

I know, where the hell have I been. So sorry! To sum it up, had a fabulicious Memorial Day weekend and since then a certain someone has been taking up a lot of my time. Not that I mind at all XD And about halfway through this chapter I hit a block and finally made myself just write it. So it's completely unedited! And this is my last week of school, so with more free time who knows how fast updates will come. Or I might keep being lazy. Regardless, enjoy. Major points to anyone who finds a song reference in this first part! :D

* * *

From there, everything seemed to speed up. They had the dresses, the flowers, the rings, and the engravings all checked off their list of wedding adventures. The next day at work Taub, of all people, surprised Thirteen by striking up a conversation about wedding cakes. For a man who never took much interest in anything that didn't directly concern him (although he'd need to steam press a nice shirt and wear a suit) he seemed to be very interested in what kind of cake they were having. Thirteen suspected that maybe his wife feared that they really would have a cake straight out of a Vegas shing-ding.

As a result, Thirteen clocked out early and visited a bakery she heard had great pastry chefs. After five minutes, she had three plates full of samples along with pictures of all the best wedding cake designs. It was nice to be charming.

"How's the red velvet?" Cameron asked through a mouthful of chocolate mousse.

Remy frowned in contemplation. "It's ok I guess. I've never had it before so I don't know if it's any good."

Cameron took the rest of the bite-size sample on her fork and nibbled on it. "Not nearly as good as my Aunt Elise's red velvet cake. Cross it off."

"How good is your aunt's?" Remy questioned, crossing out the sample number on a scribbled down list of flavors to die for.

"She won in the state fair in 1984. Really moist and you didn't get that sick feeling in your stomach, even if you ate the whole thing," Allison said, smiling softly.

Remy raised an eyebrow. "Are we talking from experience here?"

The blonde doctor smirked and took another bite of cake. Remy rolled her eyes. "Should we invite her?" she asked. "We haven't drawn up invitations yet. We don't want to get a cake too small right?"

Cameron made a face as she chewed and swallowed before saying, "I guess we could. But she's almost eighty I think, I don't know if she travels."

"What about your parents?" the younger woman asked carefully.

Allison pushed one cake sample into another. "What about your dad?" she returned the question, not accusingly but still with a level of undertone Remy didn't miss.

"So what, it'll be House, Wilson, the team, and Cuddy? That's not even enough for the people supposed to stand up there with you," the brunette pointed out.

"We have more friends than that," Cameron said, rolling her eyes. Remy again raised an eyebrow. "Ok, I do. But it'll be a small guest list anyway; we don't need a huge cake."

Thirteen looked at her for a minute before trying another sample with blue frosting. "Your parents weren't there when you married Chase," she mentioned quietly.

Cameron exhaled, nostrils flaring slightly. "We don't talk that much."

Remy watched her as she said this and clenched her jaw. They in general didn't talk about things neither of them wanted to talk about, so she actually never knew much about Cameron's family since it brought up bad memories of her own. It just wasn't that important. So she nodded. It didn't matter. "I don't think my dad would be thrilled to hear from me either. Guess House gets to walk me down the aisle," she joked.

"You think he would?" Allison asked mid-bite.

"I'm still his duckling, I bet he thinks it's his duty. Along with getting to make the toast and smashing cake into your face," Remy said, smirking.

"What?" Cameron gasped. "I'll kill him if he does!"

The brunette chewed a bit before being able to say, "Actually, that's one of my perks. That's why this cake better taste good."

Cameron rolled her eyes. In neither of her previous marriages had she had the utter misfortune of this tradition. "Rem, don't," she whined. "I'll have my hair up and make up, and then in all the pictures it'll look caked on. Literally!"

"But that's like the second best part of the wedding!" the younger doctor said. "And don't worry, I won't get frosting up your nose. Promise."

Cameron sighed and took a bite of another sample. "As long as I get to do it to you too," she chimed.

"Nope," Remy deadpanned. "I'm on top, it's my pleasure."

"Not last night!" the blonde shot back.

"Allison, just accept that I get to smash gobs of cake into your face," Thirteen said, closing her eyes and taking another bite of cake.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yea-"

Cameron smirked and slammed an untouched sample plate into her fiancée's face, the icing smearing all over her face. Her mouth fell open as the cake began to slide down her cheeks, her eyes still closed with specks of icing dotting her eyelashes. "You are _so_ dead," she breathed, wiping off most of the cake and in the same motion grabbing a plate and smashing it over Cameron's head.

Cameron shrieked as blue frosting landed in her hair. "Remy!" she screeched, grabbing another chunk of cake.

Disregarding thoughts of the impending mess later and just how low on the maturity scale they were sinking, Remy took two cakes with bright yellow frosting and smushed them into Allison's cheeks. "How d'you like that, huh?"

Cameron laughed and wiped it off, licking around her lips and grabbing more cake. "Wait," she said right before Remy dropped cake down her shirt. "Taste this," she told her, pointing to her cheek.

Remy stifled a laugh. "You want me to lick cake off your cheek?"

Allison nodded, "Taste it!"

Not finding any reason to object, the younger woman licked the frosting off Cameron's left cheek and scraped off the cake with her teeth. Her eyes went wide. "That's…really good cake. What kind of frosting?"

"Some kind of butter cream, I think," Allison said, licking her fingers. "And chocolate cake, it's…"

"Really good," Remy breathed, licking more frosting off her fiancée's cheeks, getting ever closer to her lips.

"What sample number was that?" Cameron asked, fighting the temptation to kiss away the specks away the dots of icing.

"Uh…" Remy half moaned, groping around for the plate covered in yellow frosting with its tag number while still tasting Allison's face. She found it and looked out of the corner of her eye. "I'll give you one guess."

Cameron rolled her eyes and leaned as far away as possible from the brunette while still not getting any cake on the sofa and grabbed the catalog of cake pictures, flipping through to number thirteen. "Found it."

Remy wrapped her arms around the older doctor and studied the picture. It was only three layers high, simple white with a yellow and black design in a bottom corner, accented all the way through the cake by the pattern on the upper tiers. "It looks like a sunflower," she said.

"It might be," Cameron answered, squinting a bit. "I think it is. Didn't we get sunflowers for the reception?"

Remy nodded, beginning to smile. "I like it. Is this the cake?" she asked teasingly.

The blonde smirked and captured her lips in a deep kiss. Remy put both hands on the sides of her face, not caring about any frosting she'd missed. They parted, panting, while Remy said, "It tastes good enough to me."

Cameron ran her tongue over the brunette's bottom lip, "Mhm. Now…let's clean up."

"Good idea," Thirteen grinned, "I won't marry you if that blue icing turns your hair green."

"If it does it's your fault, Remy Hadley!" she shouted as her fiancée pulled her up off the couch and in the direction of the shower.

* * *

The next morning, a rare summer New Jersey rain shower awoke Thirteen from an incredibly uncomfortable position she'd managed to fall asleep in. Blinking away sleep, she cracked her spine and glanced at Cameron, whose arm was tangled up in the iron bed frame. Thirteen tilted her head, her still dull brain faintly wondering if that was anatomically possible. A cool draft of air made her sink back into the pleasant, warm bed, and she took the opportunity to watch her fiancée sleep.

Despite the odd placement of Cameron's right arm, her left was tucked under her as she slept on her stomach, resting her chin on the depression on the pillow. Her hair was still dark and in clumps, indicating that she'd been sleeping on it for most of the night and it hadn't had time to fully dry from the showering – or rather, clean up time from the mess they'd made. The brunette smirked as she recalled the rest of the night, their reward for doing such a great job cleaning up as she'd said. As the rain continued to drum outside and on the skylight, the rays that made it through in turn dancing on Cameron's face, Remy realized how at peace she was in that moment. And at the same time it was unbelievable and thrilling that soon they'd be walking down the aisle.

She suddenly had the feeling that someone was watching her. Her unease was put to rest at the sight of two bright, albeit half-lidded eyes on her. "Having fun?" Allison's sleepy, slightly hoarse voice asked. She grinned sheepishly and swallowed, trying to get rid of her sore throat.

Remy broke out into a smile and leaned forward to just brush her lips against Cameron's nose. "Best morning ever."

The blonde snuggled closer. "Have a nice dream?"

Thirteen shrugged her shoulders. "I don't really remember it. But you were there…so yeah, I'd say so," she said with a smirk.

Cameron rolled her eyes. "I'm not even up for a whole minute and you're already being a smartass."

"What can I say?" Remy asked. The older doctor just grinned, showing off her round cheeks as her pink lips stretched tightly. "You're adorable," the brunette couldn't help but say, causing a slight blush. It turned into a shiver.

"It's cold in here," Allison said, finally untangling her arm from the metal bars and burying both arms in a sheet.

"Well," Remy started, "I think there are two good reasons for that. One, you somehow managed to kick off most of the blankets and sheets," she said, nodding to the sheet Cameron was holding and the rest of it hanging off the bed, "and you opened the window last night to get rid of the steam from the shower."

Cameron smiled mischievously. "It was getting hot."

She shivered again and Remy opened one arm. "Come here."

Sighing softly, Allison scooted over against Remy and salvaged whatever sheets and blankets she could before Remy draped her arm over her. The blonde took a deep breath and closed her eyes.

"Someone doesn't want to get up," Thirteen whispered teasingly, rubbing circles on her back between her shoulder blades.

Cameron let out an odd whining sound. "Laziness is the mother of efficiency," she mumbled with a hint of sarcasm.

"Early to bed, early to rise," Remy fired back. "We have lots to do today."

"Do not. It's...Thursday."

"Try Sunday dear," the younger doctor quipped.

"Exactly," she muttered, "It's the day of rest."

Thirteen quirked an eyebrow and waited.

Cameron sighed and opened her eyes, rolling over on her back. "Fine, I'm up. What's on the agenda?"

The brunette smirked. "It's not just any Sunday. It's the Fourth of July."

"Wow. It is, isn't it? I totally forgot. Which you'd think with all the fire hazard and have a safe party demos on the Today show, it'd be impossible," Allison said more to herself. "But last time I checked, we can't send rockets off the roof."

Remy glared at her playfully. "I thought we had an agreement never to mention that again."

"Oops," she said, covering her grinning mouth. "Sorry, I distracted you. Why does the Fourth of July matter?"

"Normally it wouldn't," Remy said, propping herself up with an elbow, "but a lot of businesses have great deals today...including wedding invitation designers."

The blonde sighed. "Rem, do we have to? We only have like ten people coming anyway. _Max._" Of all the things needed to plan a wedding, one of the most important but almost definitely annoying parts was sending out invitations.

"Think of it like this, Allison. A wedding is like med school. You invest lots and lots of money, but you have to write your thesis to get a new article attached to your name."

Cameron smirked. "You spend too much time around House."

Thirteen sighed but couldn't deny the fact. "Come on, get up. I have a surprise for you."

The older doctor perked up right away. "Oh no, what did you do?"

"Nothing," Remy insisted, "yet. C'mon, get dressed. We're going out."

"Where?"

"Oh, out n' about. You'll see."

* * *

Cameron was sitting at a table with her laptop at Foxhole, that stupid lesbian bar Remy loved. The pounding music was giving her a headache along with the luminescent countertops staring her in the face. Thirteen said she'd get them drinks and to just look at the site she'd bookmarked while she waited. Well the blonde had been sitting there for ten minutes browsing stupid wedding invitations and Remy was nowhere to be seen. There were tons of cute twenty-somethings around all looking for a great time. Cameron, with her unsexy outfit and ring on her finger, suddenly felt very out of place.

Meanwhile at the bar, Thirteen was on her second cocktail. All the body heat was making her sweat just enough to give her skin a sheen and pick up the lights. She felt a shift in the air and a younger blonde woman with a pixie cut sat next to her on a bar stool, which was closer than it really should have been.

"Haven't seen you lately," she drawled, tipping her glass in Remy's direction.

"It's been six months at least," Thirteen replied, rather amused. You'd think with all the socialization in bars, there would be better ways to start a conversation. Maybe someone should write a book on the technique.

"Girlfriend keeps you on a tight leash? We've all been there," the woman said. She raised her glass, "To sparks in the air."

Remy quirked an eyebrow. "Nice try, but I'm engaged," she told her, flashing her ring, which had been hidden by a shadow. She clinked the glasses together and took a drink anyway while the stunned girl awkwardly took a sip. "I am having a really big wedding though. Pick out any girl in here and she'll be there, guaranteed."

The woman grinned and pointed with her finger behind Remy's back, "How 'bout her?"

The brunette turned, grinning, only for it to quickly fall at the sight of her fiancée.

Cameron was having a hard time not exploding. "Having fun?" she asked through gritted teeth.

Remy smiled up at her. "Hey baby. I was just telling, um,"

"Melanie," the woman whispered under her breath.

"Telling Melanie about our wedding. To fill seats you know. You were looking at invitations, right?" she questioned, leaning against the bar.

Cameron's nostrils flared. "Remy, if you're going to chat up hot girls to come to our wedding so you dance with them at the reception, I sure as hell am not going to pay to have 25 deluxe invitations with custom font and monogram lettering! I'd rather have my parents there!" she said, her voice getting steadily higher and louder.

Thirteen's mouth hung open for just a minute before asking, "What website were you on?"

Allison was taken aback for a second. "The one you bookmarked…Why?"

Remy stood up and after a split second of consideration took her cocktail glass, walking over to the table with the laptop. She used the touchpad and then typed something as Cameron walked over, fuming. "Ally, there were two bookmarked. Next time, choose the one that says 'click this'."

The blonde glared at her. "I don't make me dump this on your head."

"Please don't," she said sincerely. She turned the screen so Cameron could see. "You can build your own wedding invitations, even doing one uniquely for that person, as many as you want. It shows you how to print them out for free. So you can tell your parents how much it would mean to you to have them there."

"What?" Allison asked dumbly.

"You said you'd rather have them there than that bimbo, right?" Remy said, smirking.

Cameron sighed. "I hate when you do these crazy plans to trick me into something or try and teach me a lesson."

"Blame my dark teenage years in a basement, plotting until three am," Remy deadpanned. "Random plan #643, pick up women without getting slapped by fiancée, complete."

Without warning, Cameron poured the cocktail down the front of Remy's shirt. The younger woman's jaw dropped as the liquid seeped into her shirt and her bra was visible.

"Much more satisfactory than slapping you," Cameron said as quite a few people looked on.

"I love you?"

"Love you too. Go pay for your drink."

From a dark corner, a man looked on while sipping a beer.

"You know them?" the female bartender asked.

House smirked. "Nope."


	5. Chapter 5

No, you aren't hallucinating! I updated. I know, it's been forever and 6 weeks. Life has been busy, too much to summarize. But I finally looked at this and said fuck it, I have enough for a chapter. And it's better than waiting another month to finally get them down the aisle. Don't expect another update _too_ quickly, I haven't worked on my summer assignments and will be in New York City next week (YAY! Any Camteen fans up there? :D) but I will not let myself go without updating like this again. If I do, I give everyone the right to harrass me til I pick it back up. Cheers~

* * *

All of a sudden, it was there. The day was August 12th, the time 10:52 pm, location a bit outside Boston, near Cambridge. And Allison Cameron couldn't for the life of her fall asleep.

"Ally, would you please stop moving?" Remy grumbled, burying her head further into the pillow. Everything in the place felt right out of the 18th century, including the goose feathers in her hair where the silk slip covers had worn away. The blankets felt fresh at first, but in the August heat, even at night everything held a musty air. And Remy needed some rest. "Kind of a big day tomorrow."

Cameron sighed and untucked her arms from the sheets, stretching them behind her head and then twisting one way, then the other, before sighing even more annoyingly. "I can't sleep," she whined.

"Oh," Remy grunted. "Now it all makes sense."

"Remy," the blonde sighed tiredly, too worked up and worn out to even say anything else.

"Allison," Remy replied softly, finally opening her eyes. Cameron looked pleading and anxious, which was more than enough to really get Thirteen's attention. Although more than comfortable, she turned onto her side and opened her arms, to which the older woman eagerly crawled into. "You're clingy lately," she remarked.

"We're getting married," Cameron whispered with a nervous chuckle. "Get used to it."

Thirteen smirked. "I didn't say I minded, but…you've done this two times before. If anything, it's me who should be the nervous wreck."

"You already were. At dinner, when you met my parents," Allison reminded her cheekily.

The brunette was so grateful for the amazing phenomenon of darkness at nighttime to hide any untimely blushing. "Not many people introduce me to their parents," she answered, "the day before I happen to be tying the knot."

"Yeah, well…" Cameron trailed off, not really sure where the thought had been going. The unexplainable comfort of Remy's closeness was starting to sink in, particularly with her eyelids. "Hey, Remy?"

"Yes?"

"Do you believe in happily ever afters?"

The younger woman was silent for a minute. "Do you?"

Cameron was also quiet. Here went her idealism clashing with the cynicism of the real world. Oh, the questions she came up with at 11:14 PM.

The sliver of moonlight on Remy's face shifted and Allison saw her smile. "I believe House is going to put firecrackers in your bouquet."

Allison's eyes went wide. "He wouldn't."

"He told me, when you throw it. I'm supposed to act surprised when it explodes in midair," she explained.

The older woman shook her head. "And in what twisted way is that supposed to mess with us?"

"Only the way pure childlike evil can. Followed by a pie to the face."

Cameron craned her neck to look at her fiancée. "You're such a conniving liar. He's trained you well."

Remy beamed and kissed her forehead. "Ok then, don't believe me." She pulled her closer and Allison rested her head against her bare shoulder. After a few minutes, she was finally drifting off again.

"I do."

"You do what?" Remy half asked, half yawned.

Cameron bit the inside of her cheek and smirked. "Nothing. Just practicing."

"Well," the younger woman said, "by the power vested in me, I order you to shut up and get some sleep."

Allison found her hand under the sheet and squeezed it. "And who gives you this power?" she questioned.

"Madonna," Thirteen deadpanned.

Cameron just shook her head. "I love you."

"Love you too."

* * *

"What do you mean, we're short on chairs? Has the cake arrived yet? Well, where is it? And you're sure the car will be parked out front? It's only rented for the day. Is everything set up?"

"Jeez, hold on!" Wilson said, turning into the gravel parking lot while trying to juggle his cell phone against his ear and not run the front of his vehicle through a tall window. He had to say, the house was absolutely gorgeous. It had a wrap-around porch and quirky blue paint with yellow trim and red roof tiles. Such places were rare in New England, it had a range of architectural styles that he was sure made the house unique. But of course, the real excitement was inside. The doors were open and the ceremony was in the sunroom on the second floor. It was nice enough to have it outside, but with the intense heat wave coming through it was more practical to have the best of both worlds. And the frosting wouldn't melt.

"Wilson, pay attention!" a gruff voice said from the phone.

Wilson jumped at attention and held the phone back up to his ear. "Yeah, I'm just getting here. I'll call Rachel about the cake. So we're short on chairs? Can you handle it?"

"What am I, a fairy godmother? I'm just passing along what I've been told to headquarters. My only job is to get half of the bridal party to the chapel and limp her down the aisle," House answered.

"I still can't believe Remy chose you, of all people," Wilson mumbled, more to himself as he got out of his car.

"Not as unbelievable as _Chase _walking Cameron down the aisle," House sneered. "Now that's irony."

"But Cameron's parents are here. Her father is giving her away," Wilson told him, confused.

There was silence. "Oh. Well, my comeback isn't nearly as clever then, is it? But you being the best man, now that's laughable."

"Yup, you're losing your touch," Wilson joked. "Ok, I'm here. Over and out."

"Alpha, Bravo, Charlie!"

"Just get Thirteen here in one piece."

"That's my primary mission. Ha, get it?"

Wilson hung up. As soon as he was inside, his eyes fell upon one of the brides. He quickly forgot all manners and found himself staring. Cameron's hair was all done up in a wrapped bun with a silver hair pin on the side. Her dress was equally as stunning and he realized that the one at her previous wedding just hadn't done her justice. The dress wrapped around her, gracefully falling into a fuller skirt and dipping on the neckline just enough to be classy. Next to Remy, he couldn't wait to see her.

The rest of the room was buzzing with excitement. The reception was on this floor, which had been mostly cleared for dancing and tables set up by the side. Some people were already sneaking hors d'oeuvres while others were chatting before heading upstairs. It was up these stairs that Cameron was headed, and Wilson quickly followed. On the landing he finally caught her, and she turned around and beamed at him. "Wilson! Where have you been? Is Remy almost ready?"

"Sorry, traffic. I just called House, they should be here soon," he explained.

She grinned and ringed her hands together. "Why am I so nervous?" she asked him. "God, last night I was like this too."

"Don't worry," he assured her, placing a warm hand on her shoulder. "It's Thirteen. She wouldn't miss this for the world. Where are your flowers?"

Cameron's eyes widened, "Right, flowers!" She sighed and looked around, "I feel like I already need a shot."

"Just relax. Are your parents here yet?" he asked. "I haven't met them."

"Oh," she said, looking over at an older woman in a pink blouse. "Yeah, there's my mom. Thanks, James."

"For what?"

"Keeping House from burning the place down," she grinned.

"Don't thank me for that til you're on the honeymoon."

* * *

Thirteen slammed the smoking car hood down and let out a frustrated growl.

"Little late to become Bridezilla on me," House quipped, sitting in the driver's seat with his legs and head poking out, tapping his cane.

"House!" she suddenly snapped, "Not now." He stared at her as she hopped up on the car hood and buried her face in her hands.

House rolled his eyes. "You're not really crying, are you?"

"Of course not," she said, revealing her teary eyes for a second before looking away.

"For the love of…" House pushed himself up and limped over to the side of the car. "Stop crying," he commanded in an annoyed tone. "You'll smear the makeup. Get off the damn car before you ruin the dress."

Reluctantly, Thirteen stood up straight and crossed her arms. "You didn't happen to bring your cell phone, did you?"

The older doctor padded down his chest, checking the pockets of his black blazer. Thirteen couldn't help but smirk at his faded pink The Beatles tee popping out of the opening. "Pick a number between 0 and negative 1," he said, holding his cell phone up above his head.

She sighed. "What are we going to do?"

House pondered the question for a moment before holding out his thumb. Thirteen's heart sank and he shrugged. "I can't fix it, you sure as hell can't. And I'm not limping the whole way."

She glared at him, but it was useless. He was right. She took a seat on the hood of the car and stuck out her thumb.

* * *

Cameron was a mess.

"What's taking them so long?" she whispered, anxiously looking at the clock for the third time in the past two minutes.

"Relax dear, you'll mess up your hair," Allison's mother said, trying to calm her down.

She glanced at her father, who was the stoic but gentle type. He was seated on the bench by the door. Wilson was standing up next to him, having shed his jacket with a conflicted look on his face. He'd tried calling House three times. Her father glanced up and smiled softly. "Ally."

Cameron looked at him and stopped twisting the silver bracelet she was wearing. He walked over to a small table where there was a chess board and a cup of dice. He pulled two out said, "If the sum of what I roll is less than that number nickname of hers, she'll be here."

He tossed them up in the air and caught them, opening his lined palm to show her. "Snake eyes. Looks like she'll be here any second."

Cameron looked at him for a second before she said, "But the highest you can roll is two six's, which equals…"

He dropped the dice back in and patted her shoulder. "Exactly."

Wilson sighed and looked up at the clock. He hoped that the man was right.

* * *

"Really, you two are quite lucky. I needed to go to the market and chose the scenic route to appreciate this joyous day, a gift from our Lord."

"Yeah, it's joyous alright," House grumbled. He was thrilled to be off of his leg, but he was certain he'd rather be anywhere but here right now. The road was full of potholes, it was blistering hot, and it was a tight squeeze.

And the horses pulling their buggy smelled atrocious.

"What was that?" the young man driving said. Well, holding the reins.

"I didn't even know there were Amish in Massachusetts," Remy said, quickly covering up for her boss. If she wasn't wearing designer shoes, she'd skewer his foot with her heel.

"We pious few are indeed and sadly, few and far between. Although our Pennsylvanian brethren are more well known, this land has blessed us and we prosper. The Lord is sure to smile upon you and your future husband," he told her kindly. "My name is Jacob."

"I'm Remy," Thirteen replied, "Thanks so much for giving us a ride. This is…Greg."

House looked at her, stunned that she had had the audacity to imply he was her fiancé. Yeah, he had said they were a late to a wedding, but not THEIR wedding.

"I see," Jacob said with a slight change in pitch. "In my community, we marry quite young. Forgive my ignorance."

"We're not really-"

"It just took us awhile to find each other," Thirteen cut him off. She gave him a stern 'don't fuck this up' look and patted his good leg.

"Then I wish you many children to carry on your name, God willing," Jacob said. "Our brides wear simple blue dresses. I dare say that even in such a garment, you would look lovely."

The buggy gave a particularly hard jolt and House's cane tumbled out. "Shit," he exclaimed loudly.

Jacob pulled back on the reins. "Allow me," he said, and jumped out of the buggy, pulling on his suspenders as he carefully walked down the hill on the side of the road where the cane had landed.

Remy glared at him. "Why did you do that?" she whispered harshly.

"First he thinks I'm your father, then he flirts with you? I'm doing what any other sleaze would do," House said, scooting over on the bench to Jacob's position.

"What're you-"

House picked up the reins and gave them a good crack. "Go!"

"Oh my god," Remy gasped. The horses began going again and eventually sped up to a brisk trot. In the distance she heard Jacob yelling. "House!"

"Relax, I'll bring it back," he assured her. "Can't get thrown in the slammer on your wedding day."

Thirteen sighed and slouched in the buggy seat. "_God_ willing," she said sardonically.

And off they went.


	6. Chapter 6

Well, this is it. And it wouldn't have gotten done if I hadn't promised Less than 13 to finish it for her birthday, and that's today! So Happy Birthday, this is for you (and your girl ^^) and dedicated to quite a few other adorable couples out there. Lots of love.

Also, I just realized - last chapter I said Thirteen was meeting Cameron's parents for the first time. Well in AnonymousOW's Maybe, they were there for the proposal. Oops! Oh well.

Now, enjoy!

* * *

Cameron collapsed onto the chair by the window and buried her face in her hands. Remy was officially ten minutes late.

"I'm sure there's an explanation…" Wilson said gently. He'd had his share of weddings and knew it wasn't always smooth sailing.

"She's not coming. I've seen enough movies to know when I'm being left at the altar, James," she muttered, trying to flatten the emotion welling up in her voice.

"Ally…" her father tried.

Cameron was clearly blinking back tears. "I'm sorry you came out all this way, dad."

Mr. Cameron stared at her with his jaw set. He sniffed, making his salt and pepper mustache dance a bit, before ripping off his suit jacket.

"Dad?" Cameron asked.

"Don't worry, pumpkin. I'll fix things," he said solemnly. He took a bottle of champagne off the rack in the corner and handed it to Cameron. "Cheer up," he deadpanned before walking out and down the stairs.

Cameron watched, almost stunned, before beginning to giggle and opened the bottle with a loud pop. It fizzed and spilled over on her hand and she took a big gulp. She was going to be drinking a lot tonight, one way or another.

* * *

"You're so dead, House."

He rolled his eyes. "Don't even try and blame me. You're wearing the mass of tool and organza," he said as he gingerly rested his leg against the wheel where her dress was caught. Thirteen was awkwardly hanging out of the buggy with one foot on the ground, trying to keep her balance while at the same trying to free the dress where it was twisted around a nail on the wheel. She was lucky she hadn't fallen on her face out of the thing. House, of course, was being no help.

"You could have offered me a hand!" she said angrily, yanking at the dress in frustration. With each tug she heard more fabric ripping. God, Cameron would kill her for his. Not to mention all the rust and mud she was sure were already on it, both on the bottom and where she had brushed the other wheel.

"I'm crippled," House told her, rolling his eyes. She really should have known by now that he wouldn't be any help. The fact that they were finally at the bed and breakfast – well, close, at the end of the long driveway that the horses refused to go up. They'd have to walk the next hundred yards or so on a rather annoying uphill angle.

"Don't make me have these horses run you over. Then you'd be a paraplegic," the younger doctor threatened. "Now help me get the damn dress off!"

House wiggled his eyebrows, "Now those are words I've been waiting for."

Thirteen just rolled her eyes. "Do you have a pocket knife, or a lighter? Hell, even a key might work."

House thought for a moment, and then pushed himself up off the front wheel. Out of nowhere, he hugged her with one arm. "Put your arms around my waist," he instructed.

"Wha-?"

"I'm doing this for your own good, Thirteen," he said before she had time to question it. She did as she was told and gripped him tightly. Without warning, he spun his cane around and whacked one of the horses in the butt. It startled the animal and she and the other horse took off, pulling the carriage and turning the wheels. Thirteen shrieked and House spun with her on his good leg, pulling the dress away before they were carried down the road.

Thirteen was clinging to him in a death grip. She glared at him and spat, "You couldn't have _told _me you were going to do that?"

House just smirked. "Now what's the fun in that?"

"House, not everything is a game! It's my wedding day for fuck's sake, will you just-"

"Remy, is that you?" A voice called.

Mr. Cameron was walking down the driveway. They turned and he broke into a warm smile when he saw that it was, indeed, the missing bride. "Where have you been? Allison's been worried sick."

Remy's shoulders fell, the adrenaline leaving her and the implications of how late she was really sinking in. She'd just been angry at House this whole time. "I know I'm…the car broke down," she offered lamely. This was just great. "And the dress is…" she held it up, so he could see the evidence for himself. The gleaming white fabric was stained with grass, mud, rust, and dust. Just wonderful.

Mr. Cameron examined it with a knit in his brow. He then looked down at his own attire, a white button down shirt and his suit pants held up by…

Light bulb moment. "Say…you like suspenders, don't you?" he asked.

* * *

Cameron was dancing in the middle of the room and it was beginning to worry Wilson. Mrs. Cameron had left a moment after her husband, maybe to tell the guests that they were having some difficulties. Which, in wedding terms, could mean a number of things but was almost always catastrophic or embarrassing. Wilson would put his money on both, after watching Allison Cameron spin around, almost losing her footing twice.

"I think you've had enough of that," he said, getting up and trying to gently pry the bottle out of her hand.

"Drinking champagne, made by an angel…Who goes by the name of Glitter and Gabriel," she sang under her breath, eyes closed. She smiled at him sadly, and he realized that she was still quite sober. Which was…good. Thirteen would kill him if he had just sat by while she drank herself to a bubbly happiness.

Suddenly, his phone started vibrating. He jumped and quickly pulled it out, almost dropping it in the process. "House!" he said breathlessly. Cameron looked up, wide eyed. "Where are you?"

"Is the overly caring one ready?" House asked casually.

"House, tell me what's going on," Wilson demanded into the phone.

"Just send her down the aisle, Wilson," House said in an annoyed tone.

"Her father just went to find you two," he told him. "Who's supposed to give her away?"

"Oh my god," Wilson could positively see House rolling his eyes. "It's a lesbian wedding. She doesn't need a man to give her to anyone. Isn't that the whole base of feminism?"

Wilson hung up. Cameron was looking at him apprehensively as he slid the phone back into his pocket. "He says…go in."

"Where is she?" The blonde asked.

Wilson shook his head. "He didn't say. Just for you to go in."

Cameron bit her lip and paced the small room for a few seconds. She took a deep breath and turned around to face him again. "How do I look?" she questioned sheepishly.

He smiled and handed her the bouquet of flowers. "Beautiful," he answered simply.

She nodded and stopped in the doorway, right before the larger door to where the wedding would take place. The wedding…she was about to be a wife. Closing her eyes and smiling, she kissed the engagement ring she wore on her finger, knowing another ring was about to join it, and remembered how excited she'd been when Remy finally proposed. And it couldn't even compare to the joy she felt right now in her heart.

She walked forward and Wilson pushed open the door.

The familiar notes rang out. Remy was, after all, a romantic.

And there she was. Standing at the front of the room, with light flooding in from the open windows and a slight breeze rustling her hair. She stood, not in the dress which she had looked so stunning in, but in a white suit with the jacket open with black suspenders showing and a white tank top. Peaking out of the pants that make her legs look miles long, she saw her heels, the only part of the original outfit she chose to keep. But she looked…amazing.

Not caring about the music or anything else, Cameron ran. Past their guests, past her parents, past House on the side, up to the love of her life. She wrapped her arms around her neck and kissed her. She kissed her and felt soft hands caressing her shoulders, arms sliding down to hold her by the waist. In that moment, all the worry and stress that had been building up to this wedding melted away. It was just her and Remy.

She loved her. She loved her, loved her, loved her.

They parted slowly. Cameron looked up into Remy's eyes, the blue-green hue taking her to a far away beach, looking up at an infinite sky with infinite time, a neverending paradise that existed just when Remy held her. When she looked at her so lovingly, that she forgot the rest of the world.

Remy smiled at her. Without breaking their gaze, she took the ring from her pocket and slipped it on Allison's finger. "I do."

Cameron beamed. The vows were already said. They were already bonded, to love. To love, to love, to love. Forever.

"I do."

* * *

*hands out tissues*

I planned to have a reception, but this just felt right. Sorry if it seems rushed or cliche, and for any typos - this is hot off the press. Thanks everyone for sticking by my terribly inconsistant updates, I'll really try and do better about that. Now...what next? I have no idea. But Camteen shall live on! Don't worry, be happy. Get your smile on. A bunch of other catch phrases. Peace out.


End file.
